I wore a Blossom hat to school. I had just started junior high and it was like the third day of the school year. I had this brand new crushed velvet hat with little pink rosebuds and I was so excited to wear it. I paired it with a satin floral vest, a pink turtleneck, and a pair of stirrup pants, as was the style at the time, and strutted into school knowing I was stylin’.

I had no idea there was a rule against hats, and in homeroom, in front of everyone, my battleaxe of a homeroom teacher yelled at me: “Who told you you could wear a hat?!” To which little timid me said “… my mom?” And she yelled “You know you’re not allowed to wear hats in school, take that off right now! I don’t want to see it again!” And I almost fucking cried.

Thanks for embarrassing me in front of everyone, Mrs. DeFilippo.